Finding Hope in a Broken World: Small Acts That Still Matter
- Dr. Scott Eilers, PsyD, LP
- Mar 28
- 4 min read
Updated: 5 days ago
If you've spent most of your life wondering why society just doesn't feel right to you, I want to tell you something I wish someone had told me a long time ago.
That feeling isn't evidence that something is wrong with you. It might actually be evidence that you're paying closer attention than most people.
I Stopped Blaming Myself for Not Loving a World That Wasn't Built for People Like Me
For years, I assumed I was the problem. I couldn't just be happy, couldn't just fit in, couldn't just go with the flow. And to be fair, sometimes I didn't try.
But part of the reason I didn't try is because the outcome barely changed whether I did or didn't.
This place has never felt like home to me, and I spent a huge chunk of my life thinking that said something about me rather than something about the world I was living in.
Here's where I eventually landed. We live in a society that measures your value almost entirely by what you produce. Not by how kind you are. Not by how much love you bring into a room.
You can be genuinely terrible to the people around you, but if you're talented enough, this world will still reward you. We incentivize self-serving behavior and then act shocked when people behave selfishly.
That disconnect isn't something you invented. You're just one of the people honest enough to notice it.
Refusing to Accept the Terms of a Broken System Is Actually a Sign of Strength
Hardening your heart against everything you see, scrolling past the pain, absorbing it and just keeping going, that is the path of least resistance. And I get why people do it.
Sometimes it's survival. I'm not judging anyone for that. But I do think there's a cost to it. When you internalize that external brokenness and let it become part of who you are, something important starts to erode.
Feeling like you don't fit in, feeling frustrated by the injustice and the dysfunction, that's not cynicism. That's your humanity still working. And if you're reading this while doing reasonably well in life and still feeling this way, that matters.
I'm doing pretty well now, and I still feel it every time I step outside the little corner of the world I've carved out for myself. Healing doesn't mean you suddenly start loving a system that was never designed with your wellbeing in mind.
Creating Your Own Corner of Stability
What I've found is that the single most powerful thing any of us can do is swim against the tide in small, deliberate ways.
I had a teacher in high school who smiled at me every single time she passed me in the hallway. I wasn't in her class. I never even spoke to her. I looked like the last person on earth who wanted a smile. She did it anyway, and some days that was the only good thing that happened to me.
On the days when you feel like you need just one moment to keep your hope alive, try being that moment for someone else. Not because the world deserves it, but because the person standing in front of you might.
You Don't Have to Love This Place to Build Something Good Inside It
This world is brutal for most of us. But you can carve out something real and meaningful, even in a system that wasn't built for people who feel deeply. Keep that softness. Keep noticing what's wrong. And when you can, be the reason someone else gets through another day.
(If this post hit home, you’ll probably connect with my new book, The Light Between the Leaves. It’s a practical guide for the days when “try harder” stops working.
-Scott
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FAQ
Q: Can anxiety routines be a sign of depression?Yes. Many people with high-functioning depression use anxiety routines as coping strategies. These routines often mask deeper struggles but also keep people stuck.
Q: What’s the difference between healthy preparation and an anxiety routine?Preparation helps you engage with life. Anxiety routines prevent you from living it. The difference is whether the habit expands or shrinks your world.
Q: What if I’ve tried therapy and it hasn’t helped?You’re not broken. Traditional therapy often overlooks people who need practical, science-based strategies. That’s why I share tools that most mental health providers aren’t teaching.
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